Dutch Oven Your Special Someone

No, I don't mean release the fumes of hell demons and hold your unsuspecting lover under the covers until they know your scent and can never leave (don't they do that with horses?)....or you know...suffocate. I personally wouldn't want to breathe fart dust, but that's just me. Anyways, I'm talking about Dutch Oven cooking....over a fire. I've only had experience with this for about three years as Mr. Tactical is the only person I know with a Dutch Oven. Luckily, I love to cook....and camp and shoot (was overall a great weekend)

My first experience with the D.O. (got tired of typing out Dutch Oven....and again) was our first weekend camping ever (collective AWWWWWW) I got to play (ok maybe not play, "experience") with different guns as well as show off some of my wonderful cooking skills to show I was worth keeping around and had some general usefulness. (aside from being a pretty good shot...not bragging, just sayin') Now my cooking method is, look at some recipes, take the best ideas from each and then just make something absolutely mind-blowingly, food baby inducing nomage. If you come to one of his classes during September-November, you most likely will be able to sup on this as well.

Exhibit 1: Whitney's' Wilderness Stew

Normal ingredients being MEAT (nom nom nom) fresh chopped veggies, broth of some kind, and a smattering of spices. Turned out great. (obviously, I'm still here three years later) You basically get a good bed of coals going and hang the D.O. over the fire and get it nice and hot. I sauté some chopped garlic with onions and butter, add a little flour to make a roux, and then basically pour everything else in gradually. I love the D.O. because it allows it to get a nice woodsy smokey flavor without using the store bought crap. During that trip, we fired up the woodstove to keep it warm for the next day. The last time I made it, it stayed overnight in the D.O. over the fire and we had it for breakfast....it's that good. (Happy oh so steamy boyfriend)

Exhibit 2: MDT Chicken (no picture, sorry, we ate it)


Simple yet delicious. We took chicken quarters, placed them in the hot D.O. with soy sauce, worcestershire sauce, teriyaki, chopped garlic, (we even added orange slices) and let it simmer for about 45 minutes. We loved it, kids loved it, we even adapted it for non D.O. cooking and added Montreal steak seasoning. (I love that stuff, I even put it on my turkey)


You can do so many things with Dutch Oven (damn it) cooking. Seriously, Youtube that shit. You can make dessert (cobbler, brownies, cookies), rolls, all kinds of things. I mean seriously, food makes you happy, fuck shit up, go crazy, make new things. Find ways to make food you dislike, edible. Catch a squirrel. grill that bitch. (it's actually pretty good for a woodland creature)  I mean look at this happy (very blonde...wtf Whitney) smiling face!

In conclusion, cook something. Your stomach and your man will thank you for it. (or whatever you decide to date....everyone likes food)


Vix Out!

Snowmageddon 2015 and You! tips and tricks

So while sitting here in our home, snuggly and warm....well kinda warm, with Mr. Tactical, as it is snowing its balls off (haha snowballs) I realize that I'm pretty grateful for the things that I have. A house (full of blankets), warm clothes, and a warm boyfriend to stick my cold extremities on. It's times like this where I'm bundled up and working from home that I wonder, lets just say, what would have or could have happened if I did have to go to work today. I have friends that don't have anything in their car in case of emergency. I know that not most people can fit in their car is not the same as what I can put in mine, but you have to do something. I got stuck at work last week with a dead battery and no jumper cables and I felt helpless, so what would happen if say you got stuck out in the elements for even the shortest amount of time? It is cold as a witches tit outside (is that still a thing? witches tit?)

So for starters, what would you say would be good things to have in your car in case of an emergency? well for starters, what can keep you warm in an emergency? I've got plans. Plans on plans. Always have a spare change of clothes, something that will be durable and if you wind up getting wet for some reason, you have something dry to change into. I have a blanket as well as a sleeping bag in my car just in case I get stranded for any amount of time in the below freezing temperatures. I also have a pair of Matterhorn insulated boots....ebay...$45, it isn't that difficult to plan for emergencies Having some form of nibbles or snackums handy wouldn't be such a bad idea either, i mean really, all of that chihuahua shivering really burns some calories.

Another good idea would be to have some kind of first aid preps in place just in case there are cuts and scrapes along the way as well as if you run into others that may have had some mishaps. You know me, I've done other posts concerning medical supplies and how I am about hoarding useful things (*cough* boyfriend *cough*). 

Two words: FLARE GUN (you know, if that kind of thing is legal in your state) It doesn't take up much space and can be put underneath a seat or something. It could mean the difference between being stuck in a snow drift and no way for anyone to find you (turning into a human popsicle...mmmm delicious) and being found by another driver.

Also, (unfortunately) if you have kids that are driving (ok she isn't mine, but.....she's mine) it would be good to have them prepped to the point where their friends look in the trunk and go "O EM GEE I can't even!" (yeah....that serious) Get them one of those window breaky/seat belt cutty things, fill every nook and cranny with useful things and make sure they know how and when to use them. Keep yo kids safe. I've got a hand crank cell phone charger in my vehicle in case my car and my phone die. You know how kids are with cell phones...

Basically all you need to do is just think "hmmm if I was stuck in the cold, what could i not live without for at least a couple of hours" and then stuff as much of that shit in your car as you possibly can without seeming like one of those weird car hoarders where it't nothing but empty food containers and clothes.

Oh! and my cat caught a mouse today! 

So I'm going to sit here all snuggled up with my guy and my pup, under my fuzzums blanket, full of pizza, and watch a movie. Be safe, stay warm, and keep prepping!

Vix Out

Motivational and Shit

So it's come to my attention that there has been a bunch of hate going on lately in our small community and it has pretty much touched everyone (like that creepy dude no one wants to be around at parties). So seriously. Get Your Shit. Karma will sort it out so really, it's ok. So much hate has been flying around and much of it is a bunch of bull. So really. Control people....

Go eat a cheese burger. Have awesome sex. Watch a movie. Take a nap. I mean seriously calm yo tits. I wish i had the cheeseburger but i fully intend on doing the other things at some point today.

 The only thing that you can do in the current situation, is be yourself, trust in god (if you so choose, not trying to go all religious debate here) and chill the eff out. You don't have to answer to anyone at the end of the day but yourself. So if you're fucking up, fix it. If you're fucking someone over, fix it. If you need to be fucked, fix it (in a non-rapey way). It is up to you to decide what is and is not ok in your life, and fix it. Or to accept the shit that happens, and just live your life and move on. If your sole purpose is to try and sabotage someone....seriously....check yourself. See what is wrong in your life and make a change...possibly into an awesome whale.

I'm not saying I'm not guilty of this. I just realized that it isn't important to let others screw with you without your consent. Trying to fuck with someones life is a personal issue and maybe you should consider getting your head checked....or see a therapist...or that super cool whale. I have so many issues. I have problems, I have a job, I have a life, I have a boyfriend, and I make so many mistakes. But that is life. The point is to recognize the bad and bomb the shit out of that m'fer.

Ok so enough ranting. Just some shit to consider. Also a cute pibble confused about strawberries....

Vix OUT

Homeopathic Merriment and Scottish Smut

Over the past weekend, I took a trip with my mom and sister in law to Iowa. Why Iowa? (yeah, wtf is in Iowa) well, my moms favorite author was in town for a convention aptly named "Thru The Stones" for the Outlander series, ie: Scottish smut book. (They're amazing btw....and the idea was based off of early Doctor Who episodes...and we met the author and Graham McTavish...the beard....) All in all, (aside from no schmexy boyfriend) it was an amazing weekend, and my moms best birthday to date.

Being as I work in the convention and housing field, it was a bit weird going to a convention. They offered classes geared towards the time period where the books take place (which is 18th century Scotland). I wound up taking the 18th century medical class, Scottish dance, BEEEEEES, and Edible Landscape (geared towards Iowa.....that really helps me here on the east coast....)

Kind of interesting and probably important information to know, the medicine class was geared towards what plants have what purposes and the bee class was all about beekeeping (and for some reason how to make pie crust....) But anyways, there was quite a bit of useful information that I figured i would share since mostly all you have to do is plant some shit or build a bee box and BAM partial self sufficiency. Edible Landscape was kind of a bust aside from "plant some trees!" so i left early...that and my sister in law was making faces and dancing through the door window...

So for starters: FUN PLANTS! plants that have other properties that will be very useful if you are unable to get modern medicines.

So first off, there are the ways that these can be used: Tincture, Compress, Poultice, and Ointments/Salves.

Tincture: Macerate in alcohol/water for 7-14 days and then strain and compress. It can be used topically or internally (in moderation).
Compress: Use clean linen (cheese cloth or muslin) soak in the Tincture.
Poultice: Crushed/Ground herbs adding water, whiskey, or fat to moisten if the herbs are dried. Apply to skin, make sure it is hot/warm temperature. Used for burns/open wounds. you layer cloth/herbs to prevent sticking, and often covered with wool flannel to preserve heat.
Ointment/Salves: Base of lard/butter/suet/lanolin/goose or duck grease. Addition of powdered herbs or strong tee, add bees wax to add firmness (yeah...bees ;) I plan on making my own ointment later once i collect all the ingredients, and I'll do a post on that at a later date)

Speedweed: (no. not quick pot delivery) Can be made into a tea. Good for cough, ulcers (internal, external), gout, skin diseases (eczema/psoriasis), good diaphoretic, alterative, expectorant, also effective for conditions of the chest and kidneys.

Comfrey: Use the root, or main leaf rib: (SMASH IT WITH A HAMMER) can be used after smashage, and placed on effected area, or used with a poultice in a paste form.
Use externally for bruises, sprains, dislocations, wounds, burns, ulcers, and skin disorders.
Internal uses include ulcers, stomach/intestine irritation, urinary tract, helps promote callus formation in fractures, reduces inflammation in tendon sheath, arthritis, hematoma, and swollen glands.

Yarrow: Use flowers and leaves: can be made into a Tincture (10-30 drops 1-4x/day) Use as tea (1 tsp/cup of water 1-4x/day), Poultice, or used topically.
It is an anti-inflammatory and astringent, strengthens the urinary tract system, veins, mucus membranes, anti-fungal, styptic, diaphoretic, and anodyne. Used as a tea (which is safer than the tincture): Taken hot, it induces sweating, taken cold it can be a diuretic. It can help with the first stage of colds/fevers, bleeding, hemorrhoids, and Shark week problems.

Calendula: Use flowers prior to opening. Use as a tea (2-3 heaping Tbsp per cup of water) Use as tincture (1:5 ratio of plant to 20% Alchohol base...dont use too much) Use as a cytophylactic, antiseptic, anti-inflammatory, lymphagogue, antiviral/bacterial, choleretic, and demulcent. (I knew what these meant in the class, feel free to do your own research BIG wordsss :) Can be used on wounds, burns, bruises, boils, and rashes. Caution for preggers ladies thoug, has abortifacient effects. So a no go for the baby trains.

Plantain: (om nom nom) Use the leaves. Tincture: (1:1 ratio 15-40 drops 1-4x/day) Poultice fresh leaves. Use as an antiseptic, anti-bacterial, astringent, diuretic, and anti-inflammatory. Can be used to draw out splinters, help with UTI and respiratory infection. It is also good to add to cough syrup and is anti-inflammatory to mucus membranes.

Garlic: (Om nom nom) Use the cloves. Can be used as an anti-microbial/bacterial/fungal/parasitic. Mild anti-coagulant, diuretic, naturetic, anti-spasmodic, hypoglycemic, anti-thrombotic, it protects the liver, inhibits tumor growth, supports immune function, decreases plaque buildup in the arteries, good for infectious diseases, clears up dysentery (if only i had had this while playing the Oregon trail) reduces peripheral vascular disease, diabetes, and liver disease. Garlic is pretty much the shiz.

I have more, but my hand is starting to cramp (bad flashbacks of college writing) so to that I say To Be Continued...

(The woman that did this class's name is Pamela Taylor ND and she has a book so yeah. consider it)

For the bees, there was a lot of instruction on bee keeping, ordering bees, how to drain the honey from the comb, and how to clean the wax to use for candles, ointments etc. (it takes 7lbs of honey to make 1lb of wax....lots of hard work) It also takes 90lbs of honey to get a box of bees through the winter, they also included a list of annuals, perennials, vegetables, trees, and shrubs that attract honeybees. speaking of honey, did I mention i sell honey? I know I have, and Oh Em Gee, look. Buckwheat honey! It's sooooo dark and rich and full of vitamins and antioxidants! DELICIOUS and in fun tactical packs! (glamour shot glamour shot)

Ok I'm done :) I will do a more in depth instruction on bees for my next post because it really is pretty interesting. I know i took too many notes. I'll post the honey/cooking recipes too. BTW did you know that honey on buttered biscuits is DELICIOUS? I found that out. I don't even like honey but this was like crack (not that i know what crack is like, but i've heard it has quite addictive qualities) I've been dreaming about it all week (biscuits, not crack).

Vix out

Ermahgerd Appersauce (Canning and YOU)

So every fall season for the past three years (yes. three glorious years with Mr. Tactical, where did the tacti-time go...) I've been canning homemade applesauce. Typically I make around 3-4 batches and then can them for later use. (or holiday gifts, my dad loves this stuff....) Last year i was able to make around 18 pint ball jars for storage. It's really not that difficult honestly (just a bit time consuming), and it will help you stock up and prepare for the tough months ahead. Canning is a good way to supplement your food supply that has quite a long shelf life. We have canned spaghetti sauce we received from a family member. Canned jam, fruit, veggies. Get a dehydrator. Educate yourself. You have the ability to grow, and save your own personal stock of noms. We have apple and peach trees where we live. It's a good idea to get something that basically provides for you every year so you can continue to prepare. I mean, look at this:

Delicious apple nom noms. Honestly, i don't like applesauce, but I like mine. Find something that you can make that will keep, and that you like, or can fix up so you like it. You can doctor many things. YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TOO MUCH FOOD STOCKED UP.

Being as the winter months are coming up, you need to consider the possibility that if you live in an area that gets bad weather, you may be stuck in your home without a way to go get provisions. Do you have a way to keep warm? Do you have food put away? We have about 5 loaves of bread in our freezer. I never thought i would be one of those crazy people who freezes bread. Powdered milk. Rice. Possibly something to spice up the rice since rice sucks.....same thing with the beans....hate beans. But beans and rice make a whole protein so there you go (still hate beans). Hunt. It's hunting season. Get deer. Rabbit. Squirrel (actually quite tasty). Get a bear. Have a bear skin rug. Put it in front of the fire and keep warm (you know. all romantic and shit. How awesome would that be. I killed you this bear...). You don't want to be stuck having to break into a Dorito truck like those people in Buffalo that got snowed in (how romantic. I brought you Doritos. not anywhere near as cool as "hey i brought you a bear" but i guess it works). Especially if you don't have access to a Dorito truck as it would make such an endeavor quite difficult. Prepare yourselves....Winter is coming....

Where are the Streamers? What, no Streamers?

So today I did something that many Americans have also done. I VOTED! (loud screams and applause). Now this was my first mid-term election EVER. I voted for the presidential race in 2008, but due to other circumstances, have not had the ability to vote since.

Now agree with voting or not, the reason this post comes up is because of all those that I ran into today that didn't vote. Not that they are objecting to the system, not because they didn't have time after work (I walked in at 7 after work, not an excuse unless you're working all day or have some other full day obligation....or if you aren't a resident...or a bear...anyways). My dilemma is that people my age are not voting. Not out of protest but because they really don't care. They didn't vote because they didn't know who they would be voting for. They didn't research. They didn't take the time to see who, whether they decide to vote or not, will be representing them in their state.

Now, this is a bit depressing to me. I've heard so many people that decide to object to voting because they feel that their voice will not be heard anyways. Fine, you don't wanna, don't do it. That is your right as an American. But to not even care who is running? kinda silly. It will effect you whether you object to it or not. So why not try and understand what is going to be happening to you over the next couple of years.

I'm 26. This is the second time I've voted in MY LIFE. I'm perfectly ok with this. Whether delusional or not, I feel like I'm contributing at least the tiniest little bit.(don't crush my dreams!) The place I went? they used paper ballads because they don't trust the machines. It's run by people who want to be there. It was a very positive feel after going through a typical customer service day where on a good day I've lost at least 5% of my faith in humanity. Consider that 5% restored after tonight. Looking like an idiot, wondering what to do, where to stick the ballot....worth it. Social anxiety problems totally worth it.

I know there are going to be many that disagree. I'm not saying you're an idiot for not voting. I'm saying that if you don't take the time to educate yourself about your future, that's irresponsible....and from a very new adult. Now I'm going to get into my footy pajamas and watch Disney movies....

Vix out.

Natures Little Wonder: Bee Vom

So lately I have been looking into different types of natural remedies mainly in part to some of the great suggestions I've gotten from my ever so clever readers. Clove oil for this, lemon oil for that, etc etc. One of the main things that I've been looking into stockpiling is HONEY.

Give that Bitch some Honey, Bitches LOVE Honey

See this 5lb monster? Yeah. local sweet gold. 18 bucks. You know what it can be used for? LOTS. Bee vomit can be used as an antibiotic, sweetener. OH THE POSSIBILITIES! We picked this guy up at one of those roadside stands on my yearly hunt for apples for my homemade applesauce. Seems like a bit of an expense, but if you think about it, pure, unprocessed (with all that junk in it like they have at the grocery store, sorry little honey bear...) never goes bad and it can be used for so many things. 

Honey can be used for wound care. It has antibacterial and anti-inflammatory properties and has also been shown to hamper E. coli, salmonella, as well as fight staph. (you go little bee) I've also read that a tablespoon mixed with cinnamon can actually help with bladder infections as well. It can also be used to reduce inflammation in pimples. So there ya go. Keeping you pretty during the apocalypse brought to you by MDV ;) 

Do not give to babies though, until they are over a year old. Also, although not actually proven, if you get really bad allergies, you can start taking doses of local honey to build up an immunity to them. Some people don't really believe this, but hey, it actually worked for my brother so it really couldn't hurt. Now could it. (suck it up buttercup) I personally dislike the taste of honey, but it's uses outweigh the momentary "ew ew ew get it out of my mouth" feeling. For example: Buckwheat Honey:

The best way for me to describe Buckwheat Honey, is that it smells like a wet dog (tastes a little less like a wet dog, but really, it isn't so bad). I was at work with a terribly sore throat, and a coworker that actually raises bees handed me this. A spoonful of this every so often through the day, coats the throat (with it's antibacterial properties) and also works as a cough suppressant (or if that doesn't work, you could always just shove the jar in their mouth). I hated the taste, but it really helped. (and as with this jar, it starts to crystallize, but all you need to do is warm it up and it goes liquid again). It's like those nasty lemon honey cough drops, but you don't have to suck on it for like an hour (torture).

For me and Mr. Tactical, we actually got these to put into our bug-out bags:

Also purchased from the man with the bees, it's in an easy to use pouch (if crystallized, just stick in warm water. So it's simple in that aspect as well) with resealable spout. Good source of sugar if needed, and its antibacterial uses in the great outdoors. (Just hopefully it isn't bear season..... or ant season....) I was able to get six of these, two for our packs, and the remaining four for the pantry. (I can actually start stocking and supplying this if anyone is interested....if not....more for me anyways. And look at that sweet tactical packaging label).

Anyways, with the recent start of the preparation of our medical footlocker, This is also getting added into that box. Honey has many great uses and will never go bad, so you don't have to worry about using it within a certain amount of time, and really, can you afford not to have something like this? Prepare yourself. Use the time that you have to insure that you and your family will be comfortable and safe. Find natural options that can be gotten if commercial medication is not available. 

In short, bee bulimia is a benefit to you that you should really look into. Honey and it's many uses would definitely help in a SHTF situation and could also be used as a barter good (just like mini booze, but more useful....) And for serious. Look at this happy dude. You wish you could be as obliviously happy as this bear (silly bear).

Vix Out